sunday morning thoughts

if you could enter my brain one day a week, i would recommend sunday mornings. there is something glorious about sunday morning thoughts. they take me back, take me forward, and sometimes tell me to sit still. although i have made a pact with myself to never ever sit still, sometimes on sundays i lie to myself and sit still. i love to lie to myself. even if its just for a moment. on sundays everything is possible. its that day that familys can share, the day when others wrap up and set up for the new, the reflection day, the lazy day, the rainy day, the big newspaper day, the big breakfast day, the sports day, the bbq day, its just well... its sunday. I guess for these reasons and more sunday morning thoughts are winners.

finding things

i like to find things. i want to find more things. do you want to find things? do you want to find things with me? would you like me to help you find things? do you want to help me find things? what is better then finding things? do you like to hide things and find things later? do you like to loose things? do you like to find things that were not lost? do you want to help me hide things and find them later? do you want me to ask my friend to help you find things? do you somethings ask animals to help you find things? what animal is the best at finding things? do you think aliens are good at finding things? what if nothing was ever lost... then i could never experience the act of finding things. i do not like that thought.

i met someone

today i met someone.

i asked her how old she was, she said she had about 63 years left

i like meeting people.

lets remove something -- i dont want to add anymore

what if the world existed just as it does today but i removed all the mirrors in the world? when you went to buy a new t shirt you could not look in the mirror. when you wanted to check your teeth for fun stuff stuck on them, sorry you cant. when you wanted to look inside ur brain through a mirror image of yourself, again... nahp.

would the world be much different? Sure you could use a still lake or puddle to see yourself, and yes of course there are many ways to see yourself. but lets just eliminate mirrors.

If i could remove one material object/thing in this world i would remove mirrors. what would you remove?

the young cool scientist who polishes rocks in garages and makes sand castles at 2nd base

spring is hiding, and i feel like i am a evil person because while i am enjoying the endless rain and gloomy days, everyone around me is feeling depressed and angry. if i could steal summer too i would. and i would not apologize. i like sad gloomy people more then happy sunny people. is that okay?

time is passing by quickly and that is okay i guess. i am really not sure what i want to do next, but for the last year i have been in this bubble where i had a slack year to kinda float around and do as i pleased. it was the first time when i didnt really have to do nething. well it was the first time i was able to not plan the next step in life -- since my young scientist days. when i was a young little scientist i would build sand castles at 2nd base, not caring that my coach was yelling at me. i would polish rocks in my rock polisher. because that is what the cool kids were doing in their garages. now i think maybe i should go back to being a cool scientist. maybe i dont want to wear a suit anymore. even though i havent put one on yet, im not sure i want to either.

then again im sure the suit will go on. and i will be that person. ill just have to make a new little cool scientist one day and hope he doesn't fail like i did.

sometimes we learn amazing things...

I realized last week on Thursday i think, that i have not had a bloody nose for over a year. my teacher mentioned bloody noses and then my memory about how much i love bloody noses swirled into my mind. and then i realized that i have not had a bloody nose while in korea, meaning that it has been more then 1 year since i had one. that is amazingly not good. I miss bloody noses.

and even more amazing then that is that i learned something new. My entire life i have cracked eggs one way. I have always hit them on a counter top or on a pan of some sort. i have cracked eggs with one hand because that seemed cool, however i usually resort to the two handed method. However today February 7th 2010, i have cracked an egg with a spoon. and it was amazing. i think this new method is the best method yet. i can not really imagine myself cracking an egg again with my old ways, because with a spoon is really nice. and its very weird. i had this imitate realization that even with something as simple as our egg cracking methods, when changed, is amazing. I guess i am not old, but i guess i had some sort of idea that i knew how to crack an egg. and then my whole world got flipped upside down and i realized that i have spent 23 long years without knowing how to crack and egg with a spoon.

i hope i learn some more things on my way through life.

good night dysfunctional ryan.

the same things a year later...

in a short time i will be departing to that place where everything once was, where all my stuff is, where i used to be, where so much is familiar to me.

ill have 11 long days to see everything that i used to see. 11 days to eat all those foods that i sometimes crave. 11 days to eat salty greatness. 11 days to talk to those people i used to talk to every day.

i wanna see the things that used to give me comfort, and i want to see how they have changed, or i want to see how my mind sees them differently. if of course a mind can see something differently, im not sure about that one.

i want to drive around.

i want to use my toilet, i want to use my shower, and i want to look out my window.

i dont know what i will do first, and i dont know how i will feel, and i dont know what the weather will be like.

i cant sleep. i cant really think straight, and i dont really want to.